So why do I let my mother ruien what happiness I do grab on to so desperately? My mother is such a child. If she doesnt get her way she kicks and screams, and argues until you are to tired to fight it anymore and you submit. Even if it is something that she should get off her own lazy ass to do she just wont. She always always gets her way even if it is a ridiculous request like rubbing her feet (which is DISGUSTING by the way). 

If ever I refuse to be her unwilling slave she brings up how I'm an ungreatful bitch for all the places she drove me that I wanted to go (dance, opera, my highschool) things like that and therefore tries to guilt trip me into doing every little thing for her. Yes I am greatful that she was a supportive mother when it came to my passions in life but that shouldn't mean that I must forever pay my debt back to her bye makeing her her every meal, doing her ever dirty article of clothing, and comming to help her get ready in the morrnings. (Even with my help it takes her an hour to just put clothes and makeup on).

Two days ago I was in a fantastic mood and wanted my whole family to go to the movies to see Wall-e. Mother bitched and griped and complained and drug her heals the whole time we were getting ready and were going. We got there ten minutes late and had to sit in the front row because there weren't any seats left. She pretty much ruiend the movie for me and its that kind of crap that makes me not want to go to the movies with my family. I probably wont be making that mistake any time soon.

Last night my boyfriend begged me to reschedual a photoshoot I had planned because he had a surprise for me. He took me to star cinima, which is a dinner theatre, and we watched wall-e. He was trying to make the movie more enjoyable for me so I would feel a little better, and I did. We got home all happy full and comfy and my mother imidiately starts screaming at me from upstairs to do a load of laundry. So I do it, cause I'm in such a great mood she doesnt bother me at first. Then she starts screaming at me (keep in mind she never actually came down stairs or out of her room) telling that she knew I haden't done a load cause I haden't brought up any of her clothes. The load that had been in the dryer was my work uniform and some white towels... nothing of hers. I yelled that up to her and she continued to scream that I was lying and that she didn't have any clothes to wear to work. I searched through the dirty clothes I had down there and there was NOTHING of hers.

All I could do after that was cry... I was being screamed at by a person who wouldn't even get up to just talk to me, being called a lyer, treated like some kind of servant, and all in front of the man I love. Brandon comforted me as best her could, he and I even tried to have a little fun to take my mind of things.... but I kept on crying because of how kind he is in comparison to the woman who birthed me. He had put three roses in my room, in slightly not so obvious places because his plan that night was to be a real romantic and... i wish he had gotten the chance. All I could do was cry myself to sleep holding me roses. He spent the night... he was going to anyways but I'm glad he was there... 

If I had the money to move ou I would start doing so today but... I wont have that kind of money saved up until november. 

So the faire formally known as Song Wood is no more.... If you don't know what happened a couple months ago I'll get you as up to speed as I am. The faire split into two different ones. The owner of the faire name took it and a few of the "key players" to go make a different faire on another side of town because of lets just say artistic difference with the lang owners of the faire. 

But since the land owners were still having their fair on this side of town everyone in this area decided to continue to invest time and energy and prayers for the origional set up. Yesterday evening I was sent an email that said that faire was never going to happen, and that the land owners had stopped all communications. I'm rather upset. Sure a faire is still going to happen about as far away from my house as TRF just in a different direction... But still its not the one I was putting my effort into. 

Sadly though my alligence lies with the highest bidder, their is still a new faire opening up. So they are the highest bidder.